Another use

Our dishwasher died again. This is the third or fourth time this has happened, so we bought a new one. While removing the old dishwasher, I realized that I didn't have the proper tool required to remove the drainage hose. The clamp required a flat-head screw driver to loosen the screw. Since I was in the kitchen, I saw no need to walk to the garage and get a flat-head - for in the drawer next to the dishwasher was a perfectly good tool for the job... a butter knife!

Butter knife

Yesterday, Heidi stuck the SD card into my Canon SD300 camera upside-down. It got very, very stuck. I was as mad as a hatter (but I calmly did not let on). I got it out with a little help from a butter knife.

The butter knife is really quite a versatile tool. I suspect its most common secondary purpose is to act as a flat-head screwdriver. My earliest memories of the butter-knife-as-a-tool involve a TV and the little cylindrical transformer that you had to use to connect the cable to the back of the television. Remember those things? Remember using a butter-knife to tighten those little screws that held that thing to the TV?

I've also heard you can use them with an empty 2-litre Coke bottle, an electric stove (with those coil elements) and some hashish. "Hot-knives" is what all the kids called that use of the butter knife.

And of course it spreads butter. But its versatility allows it to spread much more than just butter. Other common items that can be spread include:

• Peanut butter (a form of butter, made from peanuts)
• Jam (or jelly)
• Cheeze Whiz (available in Canada only I think. But that's okay. It's gross.)
• Cinnamon Spread (available in Canada only I think. Too bad. It's great stuff).
• Cream Cheese (I prefer a dedicated "spreader" for this, but a butter-knife works in a pinch.)
• Margarine
• Mayonnaise (I prefer Miracle Whip.)

Wow, look at the crap I wrote. I only intended to talk about Heidi and the SD card (you forgot about that, didn't you?), and it turned into this whacky thing.

It's St. Patrick's day. I'm going to go get a beer.

Dogblog

Poor dogs.

Dogblog

Dance, White Boy, Dance

I'm sure this was staged, but it's still funny...

Dance, White Boy, Dance

Ironic?

In my previous post, I used the word "blog" and "blogging" a few times. Before publishing my post, I spell-checked it. Did you know that the dictionary used by this site (blogger.com) does not contain an entry for "blog" or "blogging"? Crazy, eh? I bet Alanis Morissette would have sung about it back in the 90s...

New Blog

I have created a new blog on another blogging site. Not that I write here very often, but the content will be slightly different on the new blog. Mostly family-related items and what not. The reason it's on MSN is because it offers space for photo albums as well as blogging. Take a look at the new blog here.

P.S. I pretty much use Firefox exclusively now as my web browser. However, I must admit that the photo album feature of the new blog is much nicer if you're using Internet Explorer.

Napoleon Dynamite

I had heard from several people that they thought this was the funniest movie of all time. So as I was flipping through the channels last night, I saw that it was playing on one of my movie channels. Because of the hype, I decided to watch it. I had been hoping for an hour and a half of gut-splitting comedy. I was sadly disappointed. While it did generate a few laughs (I particularly liked the dance routine near the end of the movie), I found it pretty dull overall.

It always seems that when a movie generates hype, I am very disappointed. I enjoy movies much more when I watch them with few or no expectations.

Read more about "Napoleon Dynamite" at IMDB.com.

Real Men Love Jesus

It must be true, because it was stencilled in huge letters on the back window of a some guy's pickup truck in the parking lot at work.

Grocery store

Lately, I've been doing most of the grocery shopping in our household. Heidi compiles the list and I head out and get the goods. (Before I forget, I must comment on the lists she compiles for me. Knowing that I don't really enjoy the grocery store, she does all she can to make it as painless as possible. So, when she creates the grocery list, she writes the items in the order in which I will come upon them on the shelves of the store - starting from produce, and finishing with any toiletries. Isn't that nice? I think so.) There is something that really bugs me about the grocery store though. What irks me the most, is other shoppers. It's amazing how preoccupied people get with their own grocery buying. They seem to forget that there are other shoppers in the store. Did you ever notice how you are always bumping in to people at the grocery store? Ever notice how people just leave their shopping carts in the middle of the isle, blocking all other people who want to get past? It's really, really annoying. I compare it to people who can't drive while talking on cell phones. So the next time you're grocery shopping, please be aware of everybody else. They'll appreciate it.

I'm a geek

A neutron walk into a bar and orders a beer. He pulls out his wallet to pay, but the bartender won't accept his money. "For you," the bartender says, "no charge."

Heheh....

Jenny, are you there? (867-5309)

This person clearly had too much time on their hands...

Jenny, are you there? (867-5309)

Rent a Midget

I think they're serious...

"Think about the best party you've ever been to, wouldn't it have been better if there was a midget there? Another boring day at the office, why not have one of our little people go down and bring some life in there!"

If you think you need a midget around to bring a smile to your face, visit them here.

Cleaning Costs

So Merry Maids came by the house today to provide an estimate for their house-cleaning services. It sounds a little costly to me: a one-time fee of $200 to clean the house from top-to-bottom, then every two weeks, they'll clean the place for $95. I don't think I'll go for it, but I'll let Heidi decide if the cost is worth it. I'll keep shopping around too - I'm sure I can find some cheaper labour.

Ass-fu#&ed!

Now what do you suppose is going on here?

Shizzy's Mailbag

This is kind of funny. If you have a minute, check it out:

Shizzy's Mailbag

Cleaning Service

Is it considered lazy to hire a regular cleaning service? Since Heidi started her new job, the house just hasn't been the same. I think if we could have somebody come in and tidy, mop, dust, clean the bathrooms etc, we might have a little more free time. Most importantly, I will not have to do any of the above-mentioned chores. It's not like I do them now, but with a cleaning service, I will not have any guilt for not doing them - and that's really what matters here. I bet cleaning services are extremely over priced. I'll look into it and report back.

Christmas Gifts

A strange thing has occurred this year. I don't really want anything for Christmas. In years past, there has always been something that I've wanted. It was almost always some kind of geek gift. If I didn't get it for Christmas (usually Heidi would get it for me), I'd just go buy it myself. But this year, I really can't think of anything I want. I've become much more money-conscious of late, and that has certainly helped curtail my desire for high-priced items, but I don't think that's the main reason. I think the real reason is that I'm becoming more practical, and I know that these gadgets would get limited use if I was to get one. I already have too many gadgets just gathering dust.

Now, if only someone would by me that 55" Sony plasma TV I saw the other day...

Staying up late

Ewan goes to bed between 8:30 and 9:00 p.m. Over the last month, his sleeping habits have deteriorated greatly. It wasn't that long ago that we could just drop him in his crib at 9:00, say "goodnight", and we wouldn't hear a noise from him until 8:00 a.m. Now when we put him to bed, he says, "stay, mama stay", or "dada stay" and he wants one of us to sit beside his bed until he falls asleep. If we leave, he throws a royal fit - kicking and screaming and the like - until we come back. Of course, we realize that by actually coming back into the room at his "request" just worsens the situation for future bed-times. However, for our sanity, it's just easier to sit there for 5 or 10 minutes until he falls asleep. One of these days, we'll just bite the bullet and let him scream his lungs out until he falls asleep or passes out.

Heidi goes to bed at about 10:00 p.m. I must admit, I will often stay up until midnight or later just because it is so quiet once those two have gone down for the night. Those couple of hours are the only time in the day that I can sit down and do what I want to do. Usually it entails watching some TV show I recently recorded, reading a magazine, or reading and writing useless blog entries like this one.

Trans-Siberian Orchestra

I went to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra last night at the Frank Erwin Center. This is the second consecutive year in which I've gone to see them. Once again, I was very impressed. For me, any live show with a significant amount of pyrotechnics is enjoyable. I'd probably go see Celine Dion in concert if she had fireworks.

Some families make it a Christmas tradition to see live shows, like The Nutcracker Suite. For me, I think I'll make it a tradition to see the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Once Ewan is old enough, I'll certainly take him with. If you have the opportunity to see them this year, I highly recommend going.

Santa Clause

If he's all-knowing, then why does he drive around on the back of a firetruck and wake up my kid while he's napping? Damn you Santa Clause. I dare you to come down my chimney this year...